Dust
by kinatsurune
Summary: Naruto thought they could be friends forever - but somehow, he gets left behind. AU, one-sided Sasunaru, oneshot. Rated T for a single curse word in my A/N.


Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.

A/N: This…is a crappy excuse of a fanfic, it's just something I had to get out of my system. If anyone cares, the second half of this is true story based on how I feel with my own best friend, but since the only thing I can write is fanfics, I simply changed a few things to match it to an AU Sasuke and Naruto. Although I definitely toned down the emotion in this, because I definitely reacted a lot worse than Naruto does, like _extremely_ pissed at myself.

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**Dust**

They had been friends for the longest time.

Of course, it didn't start off that way. Maybe one of the reasons they stayed so close for so long was their rocky beginning – hate, next to love, is one of the strongest binds between two people. And Uzumaki Naruto certainly had hated the epitome of everything he despised, Uchiha Sasuke.

He was smart. He was rich. And most of all, he had a family (a _real_ family. Bastard Kyuubi didn't count as a father when his idea of showing affection came in the form of a leather belt). And yet, not a single ounce of appreciation for everything he had that Naruto didn't.

So of course it was expected that their first meeting was in the form of a fistfight. Watching Sasuke treat even his own mother with disdain set something off in the loudmouthed blonde and his fists had acted before his brain. Thinking back on that incident now, Naruto wondered at the horror Sasuke's mother must have experienced at seeing a complete stranger randomly attack her son. Of course, _now_, she couldn't get enough of him, inviting him over for dinner at every opportunity…boy, she made the best Korean barbecue…

…anyway. It didn't take long for their previously nonexistent relationship to spiral into something of a rivalry. Of course, no one else saw it that way considering how high they held Sasuke in their esteem, but Naruto had never cared much about other people's opinions. He didn't realize it at first, but it gave him something to do, something else to focus on besides the effort in maintaining the fake smile on his face every day. Fighting Sasuke was like becoming alive again – he could release his pain, his anger at the world without raising any eyebrows.

And somehow, somewhere along the line – real anger led to real smiles. Looking back now, Naruto figured the true emotion he was now allowing himself to express couldn't be limited to just hatred. It was like opening a floodgate, one that didn't bias against what it let through – bad or good. The days didn't seem so dark anymore.

It must have been the same for Sasuke, because somehow, very gradually…their fists were subtly pulled, their biting insults lost their malice, and the glares in the hallway turned into tiny nods of acknowledgement. It didn't take too long after that for them to reveal their smiles to each other, their pain, their problems, their _real_ lives. After all, spending so much time in each other's company (even if it was in the form of a half-hearted fist fight) had to result in _something_.

Then, the biggest change in both their lives happened. College happened. Of course, Sasuke had gotten into all the top schools, while Naruto had scrounged to make it into the state university. They both knew the time would come when they couldn't spend every waking hour with each other, and both thought they had been prepared for it.

Naruto couldn't have been more wrong.

He struggled. Struggled oh so hard, not in his studies, but with his friends. Friends that were barely made, friends that extended him their hands with a friendly smile but nothing more. No trust, no confidence, no expectations. Perhaps that was his own fault, he had been unwilling at the time to accept that his relationship with Sasuke wouldn't be enough. By the time he realized, it was too late; circles had been formed, cliques had been established, and Naruto was left on the fringes waiting for the scraps of afterthought invitations when they remembered his existence.

The fake smile was back again. The bright, loud laughter returned along with the foxy grin that covered his cerulean eyes so no one could see the pain. It was starting all over again, and all those years breaking his own walls down with Sasuke were going to waste.

Now, he truly didn't have a choice. Sasuke would be his only one. Naruto wondered how his best friend was doing, imagining the cool personality attracting both male and female admirers to simply flock to him. But he'd be the same, wouldn't he? He would push them all away, disgusted with how easily they were drawn to his exterior looks. He would remember his _true_ friend, the loud obnoxious blonde that always managed to work his way under his pale, porcelain skin. He would yearn for the only one he had admitted his insecurities to, the ones involving girls and relationships and his deteriorating family. No matter how many few friends he would pick among the eager masses, Naruto would be his number one. Right?

It was under this delusion that Sasuke finally came to visit Naruto's campus during a study break. And as he watched the raven head young man step out of his car, Naruto rushed forward eagerly to give an unabashed hug to the one he had pined for for so long. Only to be stopped to a screeching halt by the pink hair that suddenly emerged.

A girlfriend. A _girl_friend. Sasuke had gotten a girlfriend. If there was one thing Naruto had been confident of, it was that Sasuke would _never_ get a girlfriend. At least, not this soon.

What had happened? Hadn't Sasuke admitted to him once before (it seemed so long ago, now), in a rare moment of insecurity, how he was deathly afraid of getting into such an intimate relationship? How the cool and indifferent attitude that seemed to attract so many was ironically a tool to keep them all away? Where did that Sasuke go?

That Sasuke was gone. It had grown up, matured, and left Naruto behind. Naruto was the one who failed to keep up with the pace of life, Naruto was the one to cling to what should have been let go. He had held so tightly to the Sasuke he had been left with, the Sasuke he had last seen before they separated for college, and didn't realize that Sasuke wouldn't exist anymore. How could he have been so immature, to think his friend would stay the same forever?

So he greeted Sasuke with a smile, lavished his pretty girlfriend Sakura with compliments, all while maintaining his foxy, foxy smile. Feeling betrayed, but knowing he had no right to. After all, it was his own fault he chose to forego making a new life and new friends in favor of clinging to the increasingly obsolete Sasuke of his past. Now, Sasuke would move forward even more and there was no other direction for Naruto to go. In his foolish attempt to maintain the path leading backwards, he had allowed all others to waste away. Now he was stuck with nothing but a dead end.

Maybe a year ago, Sasuke would notice the painful longing screaming to bleed through his eyes. Maybe a year ago, Naruto would never think to hide anything from his best and only friend. But seeing the way he looked at Sakura-chan, Naruto knew the reminiscing smiles they now shared would only be just that. Reminiscing smiles. Remembrance of a past that had been filed away like a photo album, one that could be flipped through fondly once in a while, but ultimately left to gather dust in storage.

Watching the couple in front of him get increasingly lost in each other's eyes, Naruto pulled out his silent phone and flipped it open.

"Oh, it looks like I gotta run, I forgot I was supposed to go to a party with a friend. You guys can find your way around, right?"

Without even waiting for an answer, Naruto texted a response message to his imaginary friend about the imaginary party, and saved it in his drafts. Never to be sent. It, and he, would simply gather dust until the end of time.

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A/N: Fuck, I'm such an idiot.


End file.
